here iam sitting here at my snocone stand and being as bored as i can be without going crazy..and actually this has been a day where i didnt have the cravings for the snickers or the peanut butter cups..it didnt bother me that they were here..maybe i am getting over the craving..i hope so..
sean came to see me before the game today and was trying to explain things to me..all my friends have been trying to explain things..i know everyone means well..i have to do it again..i have to get up and get going and quit talking about doing it and just do it...i cant let it get so hard that i dread trying again..because it isnt hard..its just different..its a focus everyday on what i am going to be eating and how much water am i going to drink ..it takes effort to do it..and for some reason i just didnt want to put the effort in but i wanted to see results anyway..now tell me if that makes sense..lol
but i am going to try harder to put more of an effort out..because i dont want to end up in a wheelchair or bedridden because i ate myself to death..or death..i dont want that..i need to feel the freedom that sean feels everyday..i need to do this..
i didnt do well but i didnt do awful today either..i wasnt hungry today but i did end up eating the tacos that sean brought me..i didnt make the right choices before i came to work..i ended up getting a ice cream mix from braums before i got here..so i had already made a bad choice..but i have to do better..
tomorrow is another day and hopefully wont be like today was for me..