Thursday, July 8, 2010

too stressed for anything..


i wasnt going to do this tonight, but i thought maybe writing it down might help me feel better some..i have been having the most stressed out days that i have ever seen..i have too many bills and i need to get them all paid before i have too many student loans to pay..but right now i am in between jobs so to speak..and i need to find a good one..i only have less than 2 months til my uncle closes and right now iam not getting to work as it is..the weather just isnt letting me do anything..

i did brown bag it to work today..and did really well with my calories..i have been eating fruit like apples and bananas instead of snocones and other junk...i have been better the last two days when it came to the calories..i guess my nervousness was just getting to me but now i know to really focus on it and pay attention..i have to or i would nibble all day..i didnt walk tonight, instead i kept worrying and crying over my finances...it has got me down so bad i just cant stand it anymore..i drank 3 glasses of water tonight..i will do better tomorrow on the water..i am going to be in the water challenge with sean and kenz and so i better get to drinking the 9 glasses again..i did do well last night though..after i had come home, i decided i needed to go walk even after the rain..so i did and i walked 2.1 miles in 48 minutes now..im going to be up to 3 miles by next week i hope..but yeah i went the extra tenth of a mile...i was so glad..it really took it out of me to do it but i got it done...
so hopefully tomorrow is going to be a better day for me..were supposed ot have alot of rain tomorrow and friday..so we will see if we walk for the next two days..
have a great thursday..
trying to feel my best..
kelli

6 comments:

  1. I'm up extra early this morning and reading blogs. Kelli, maybe time to look for another job? I know that can be easier said than done but it sure doesn't hurt to look. I am betting you are very reliable and that is something employers value plus you have gone back to school. Have you looked into jobs at the college? My DD found seasonal employment in a bookstore but they liked her and have kept her on for 3 years. Also, you might be able to get the loan repayment reduced. Lenders don't want you to default so should be willing to work with you. Since you are a caregiver for your mom, perhaps you could do some home health care on the side? I'm the oldest of 6 and a fixer by nature LOL. Your weight loss is only going to BENEFIT you!!!! Keep up the good work.

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  2. I know ALL ABOUT financial stress girl, believe me! I'm sorry that you're going through it too. It really has a habit of ruling our emotions, doesn't it? Stress eating is a hard thing to beat...just stay on track as best you can until things level out. I've been maintaining my weight for 3-4 weeks now, and just trying not to GAIN has been a huge accomplishment.....I know you can do it too. I'll be praying that things open up for you soon...NAN had a good point about working at the college. At the college I was going to, if you worked there at least 24 hours a week, they let you take 2 classes for free per semester! It's definitely something worth checking into. :)

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  3. Sorry you are so down Kelli...I hope it all works out for you as soon as possible. I know I could tell you to use exercise as an option for relieving stress like so many suggest, but I've always hated that piece of advice.

    Hug yourself for me.

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  4. I agree with first commenter. Look for another job, even if it's only part time to start.
    Those usually lead to full time slots.
    And losing weight will def. benefit you in the long run. In every way possible. Hang in there Kelli, don't let this run you off the rails.
    Big Hugs.

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  5. This is when you must activate your "steel curtain zone" Kelli. You've heard me talk about it and you've read what I've written about it---and now you must really understand by practicing it yourself.
    I know you're stressed Kelli---But remember---your food and exercise performance is paramount to your over-all health and happiness. Stay consistent through the storms, and it will enhance the way you handle these---I know it's easy to say---and very tough to do, but you have to fight for this Kelli. You deserve your success. It's yours.
    And way to go on getting out there and walking despite your emotional situation---that's doing it---I'm so proud of you.

    SCZ Kelli---SCZ. I love you,

    Sean

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  6. I know how stressful it is when dealing with too many bils and not enough income. But keep your head up and keep moving forward.

    Take a look again at your sidebars! You have so much there to help you keep going!

    Keep working hard and let God take care of the rest.

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