Saturday, June 12, 2010

a day closer to being thinner..

Iam sitting here at my snocone stand doing this on my phone..I would rather do on the computer
But I'm here til 10 tonight and nothing to do..so I thought I would write something..
I got up this morning and had to go run an errand, and used to I would stop at the nearest conoco
And get a 32 ounce drink, and then get another one when I went to eat, and refill it before
I went home...then I would drink more during the day..it would be easy for me to have 100 ounces
Of pop every day and that was normal..

Well today I went and did the errand and didn't even look at conoco..I know they are going to go out of business with me now..lol my sister was even noticing it too..she said she really wanted me to stop..hehe but not now
I don't even think about pop..in fact water is the only drink in my vocabulary these days..

I went and walked some today..finally had a chance to get out and do it..so I walked almost a mile..and then I came in and did my shake weight....I did the shake weight for 6 minutes and I can really feel it..it will work..
As long as I do this everyday and be consistant with everything, there is no reason for me to not lose weight..
Eventually it will all come off and then I will know how and why I put it on in the first place..
I think its very important to try and understand why we do this to ourselves..because it is us that do it..
No one else forces us to put food in our mouth or drink the pop..we choose this way because something in our life is out of balance..maybe were depressed, sad, anxious, bored..whatever it is we need to think about why we eat..why do we want to hurt ourselves..why don't we like ourself..I mean we aren't bad people just because were fat..and so many others look at heavy people as something is terribly wrong, and that's their problem, because we are good people ..

But we get into bad health because of our obesity, and then we lose hope even more..I know how that feels..when I
Weighed 356, I couldn't breath, I had shortness of breath, I couldn't walk across the street without my cane.
In fact I couldn't walk anywhere without my cane..I thought I looked good but I didn't..I thought I had self confidence
But I don't think it was there like I thought..I was friends with a lot of people but no one looked at me in any way other
Than a friend..I wanted a marriage and kids but didn't see it in my future..I'm still not sure its there but I'm better
Than I was then..my confidence really is there now..I know now I'm going to do this once and for all.
And while I'm doing it, I'm going to try and understand why I got this way..what happened that made me just eat and drink so much that I wouldn't even notice the gain..

I used to have a friend back when I was in my thirties that tried so hard to get me off of pop and onto water..I never would listen to him...I wish I had now..but I'm sure he would be pleasantly surprised to know I never drink pop ever now.I'm going to walk some more this evening and get the rest of my water in..I don't ever eat here at my job..so I will have a few calories for tonight...I've been eating a lot of letuce lately..just lettuce and some salt..
This is just a normal everyday life now..been doing this for 3 months now and it just feels normal..

Hope you all have a great weekend..I'm off tomorrow..whoohoo!
GOD BLESS YOU..
KELLI

2 comments:

  1. Hey kelli, love your new design and I love this post. What a great plan, to understand how you got here.
    I love this post all the way around. Keep i t up, you are doing great.

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  2. Self-reflection is extraordinarily important, and it sounds like you'll soon be ready to start looking within.

    I'm looking forward to seeing how well the shake weight works for you! I might have to try it too..

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